Emotionally charged post

My post from yesterday was very much a knee jerk reaction from listening to the boys talk about their visit with their bio dad. It happens every time they return. I just have such a hard time with him rolling onto the scene after a huge absence. He has always been a father when it was convenient for him. And I use the term father loosely.

First of all I was speaking of 'MY children'. I really don't feel that was appropriate. This sounds like they are just possessions to me. That's not the case. I just take my responsibility of being a mother very serious. Also, their wonderful step father has put a lot of time and energy in making sure they grow up to be the best they can be. He has the same concerns as I do for them. So for me to be throwing around the phrase 'MY children', is not fair or accurate. As for the ex, it's very difficult for me to think that they are really his children too. He doesn't act like it.

Also, the boys going to church is not the real issue. It's just that they are going to church with people that I don't know. I don't know what they are being taught or by whom. This is the control freak in me. But, I want them to learn about everything and make up their own mind as to what they think is best for them. I was just hoping it would be when they were older and better equipped to make such a decision. Also, church is a much better exposure than what he could be exposing them to. I just couldn't see all this last night in my overly emotional state of mind. But, reason is always restored and I'm thankful for it.